If It Had Been Us
by SheCameToInfectEveryone
Summary: (Has to be Read after reading "To Soothe A Monster") Thor wonders what could have been if he had claimed the mortal Colleen's heart before Banner had. Would she be safer and happier with him? Or is this a fantasy that could never be? (This marks the beginning of a series of Thor/Colleen/Loki fics and it shall be delightfully delicious if you want to come along for the ride)
1. Chapter 1

Part I

Her arms wrapped around him for one last time. He took in her sweet scent one last time, the feel of her head pressed against his chest and the melody to her voice as she whispered her goodbye. One of his hands ran through the chestnut waves of hair and lips would press against her forehead, only her forehead even though he longed to press them against hers, the lips with the perfect ruby color and natural pout. Spine tingled as she rubbed her careful circles into his back with her small perfect fingertips. As she pulled back, his hands would capture her face as he professed his love for her once more as he stared into the deep pools of blue that were her eyes. Eyes he could have lost himself in for hours. The love he professed though she thought meant like a brother, a close friend. He hid his hurt well as hands fell from her cheeks to her shoulders to the tiny hands that had broken through all of his steel walls many times over again. He entwined their fingers for a moment and brought them both to his lips for him to kiss gently. It seemed to take many lifetimes for their hands to slowly fall from each other. He died a little inside as she turned away from him for the last time. His head, his heart would never be the same. This love took his everything and just one shared breath, one caress of her hands to prove to him that his feelings were returned would undo him and he would be hers forever.

As she was walking away, hand in hand with the man that had been chosen for her, he couldn't help but wonder what would have been if the dice had been rolled a different way. If he had been the one she had been sent to first, if he had been the one to step towards her first and state her claim on his very soul. Would he still be standing here alone watching her choose the other man over him? Would she stay with him by his side for the rest of her lifetime? Would she be his? How could he feel like he had held her for all of time and it mean nothing? What would it have been like…

"If it had been us?" Thor whispered.

Colleen stopped and let go of Banner. She turned those blue eyes back to meet his. Had she heard him? Did she wonder the same? "What would it have been like, if this had been us?" He almost whimpered, voice catching and trembling in a very ungodly manner and a single tear fell down his cheek. His hands still held out from where they had been holding hers. "Every time I close my eyes, I see what could have been…don't you?"

As if to answer him…

Colleen closed her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Part II

_If had it been us…_

Colleen glared at the man they called Loki as she continued to suck on the thing they called a lollipop they'd given her. Romanov had hard pressed to let her go with to collect him as he terrorized a nation but Colleen had used her magic words against her mentor, by getting much too excited about being in a jet. Romanov, as all others, could not resist her puppy pout. As if she knew that the girl was thinking of her, Romanov ran her hand over Colleen's head. "Was this as fun as you thought?" She asked.

Colleen continued her glare at Loki, she was attempting to figure out what words could be said to break him of this violent exterior. "Would you be pleased with a portrait of me, child? It would last you many more lifetimes." He snarled at her.

Colleen smirked, he'd just said the equivalent of 'take a picture, it lasts longer.' She didn't answer him; she just continued to scrutinize him with the deep blue eyes. She was getting to him inch by inch. He wasn't this person that he pretended to be. He was very misunderstood if anything.

Loki returned her glare. "So what is your power, little one?" He asked and his tone bordered on endearing. "You do not wear a suit of metal. You do not carry a gun or a weapon of any sort. What breed of monster are you?"

Stark took a threatening step towards Loki. "Do not talk to her like that." He snarled. "Colleen, you don't have to answer a single question he asks."

Colleen gestured with her hands for Stark to relax, as she stood up. "I am no monster, Loki." She said softly. "I do have a power and I'm sure you will find out soon enough what it is. It will be used against you and you will crumble."

"Those are large words for someone so small." Loki said with a smile that could only be described as sinister. "I hardly doubt you are any match against me, tiny mortal."

Colleen reached forward and brushed a black hair from his face. "Size does not determine one's strength, Loki." She said sweetly. "I thought of all people, you would know that."

Loki laughed softly. "Throwing insults my way is not safe for you, woman."

"I'm sorry, who is the one being held captive here?" she asked, with a slight sway to her hips that was noted by all the men aboard the ship. The god's eyes even roamed her body for a minute. "I was fairly sure it was you, not me."

Thunder rumbled loudly above them. The skies had been clear only a moment before. Loki looked almost fearful. "Are you afraid of a little lightening?" She asked him a singsong way.

"Who are you to mock me?" Loki snarled at her, his eyes roamed her body once more and suggested about a million things he wanted to do to her and not all of them ended with her dead. The majority of them ended with her naked and screaming his name. "I am not overly fond of what follows if you must know."

Colleen noted the seductive glint in his eyes. This was a game she knew how to play all too well. She bit her lip in a way that did not suggest nervousness, quite the opposite actually. Her eyes told him that she could make his dreams come true. Her hips swung as she turned and walked away from him, granting him the perfect view of her backside. "Thunder is a rather strange thing to be afraid of."

Something landed on the top of the plane and within moments afterwards, a man made of nothing but muscle came onto the ship. His hair was long and blonde, his blue eyes met hers and she swore she felt some kind of electricity shoot through her. They lingered for a moment before Stark came after him. The man took his hammer and smacked it against Stark, knocking him into Steve. Colleen's eyes went wide. "COLLEEN, DO NOT GET IN HIS WAY." Romanov ordered her.

The man regarded the shocked and petrified woman for a moment. She did not pose a threat to him and he had no wish to harm someone so beautiful and so small. He reached one arm out to her and gently pressed against her flat stomach until she backed obediently into the wall. "Stay." He commanded gently, it was almost a plea as his hand left her body.

He turned his focus back to his brother whom he ripped from the bindings the mortals had him in. He swung his hammer repeatedly and jumped out of the plane.

Colleen's lollipop fell to the floor and if it was possible, her jaw would have fallen with it. She barely heard anything being said but was jolted back into reality as Stark jumped out of the plane as well. "Cap, take me with you." She demanded, grabbing the man's arm as he grabbed his shield and a parachute. "I can talk to that man, get him to calm down and return Loki to us."

Steve immediately looked to Romanov. He had seen the way the woman regarded Colleen as if she had physically given birth to her and he would not be one to be on the end of that when Colleen was taken from her. Romanov sighed much louder than necessary. "She has the ability to talk an angry bull into having tea with her." She said. "There is an extra parachute by the guns that is specifically fit to her size. You take good care of her, Cap. Don't you let Thor or Loki harms a single hair on her head or you and I are going to have problems."

Steve nodded and grabbed the parachute that Romanov had directed him to and set to work in helping the woman strap herself in. Romanov began drilling the girl on proper diving etiquette as he did so and Steve smirked as Colleen shot her attitude filled answers. They really were like mother and child.

"Let Steve jump first and then you go after him so I can watch you."

"NATASHA. I CAN DO THIS."

"I know you can, babe! I just want this for my own sanity."

"Fine," Colleen growled drawing out the vowel like a repressed teenager. "You're so demanding."

Steve shook his head at the two women as he jumped out of the jet.

…

As the wind rushed through her hair, Colleen let out a scream of pure thrill. If you had told her years ago that her parents giving her up for drugs would have led to her jumping out of a jet and talking a God into giving her what S.H.I.E.L.D wanted and making more money than she'd ever seen in her life _each day_ then she would call you crazy and talk you into giving her your wallet.

She pulled the cord on her parachute but it merely ripped right out of the bag. Shit. Shit. SHIT. "My parachute isn't deploying." She kept her voice steady even though her bladder nearly erupted with her urge to pee her pants. She was going to die. "Stark? Please!"

Stark's voice entered her ear. "Thor beat the hell out of the suit; I don't have the juice to catch you!" His voice was tight with fear.

Romanov's voice screamed into her ear. "STARK YOU GET YOUR ASS IN THE SKY RIGHT NOW."

"I CAN'T, NATASHA."

"TRY."

"I AM. I WON'T MAKE IT TO HER AT A SURVIVABLE DISTANCE. SHE'LL DIE IN MY ARMS."

Tears began to escape her eyes and fly upwards. This was it. She was going to die. At least it would be instant. The moment she hit the ground her neck or spine would break and it would be over. "I love you, Natasha." She whispered.

"Don't you say that to me, Colleen." Natasha's voice cracked. "Don't you dare say that to me. You're going to be fine. I promise."

"Natasha," Colleen said soothingly. "It'll be fine. You will go on."

"Shut up, Colleen."

"I love you."

"GOD DAMN IT, COLLEEN."

There was a loud sound that seemed as if it were nearing her. She wondered if this was just the whole imminent death thing, until she collided with cold armor and warm skin. Thor clutched her to his chest protectively with one arm as the other swung his hammer. Colleen gaped at him as arms wound around his neck instinctively. "You… you saved me." She said.

Thor's blue eyes stayed connected with hers and were filled with concern. "I told you to stay." He said gently. "You do not listen very well, little Colleen."

She let out a laugh that was much too high pitched, still slightly stricken with fear. "No, I suppose I don't." She said with a smile. "Thank you for saving me."

"You are most welcome," He said warmly as they neared the ground. He pulled her a little tighter to him. Every part of their body where her skin met his seemed to be electrified. What magic was this? What did this little woman possess? He set her down gently but his hand caught her wrist as he detached her gently from him. He brought her small hand to his lips and placed a kiss to it. "I would prefer if you did not make this a habit though." He took that time to examine her body, looking for a cut, a bruise, any damage at all. His eyes lingered longer than they need too along her curves. The woman was beautiful; he could not deny that she was pleasing to gaze upon.

"Almost dying?" She said around a giggle, this time it tinkled. "It's actually one of my favorite hobbies. I try to at least once a day."

The god gave her a disapproving look. "I do not find your sarcasm very appealing at this moment, Colleen." He chastised her.

Colleen poked out her bottom lip and Thor felt tightness in his chest. He immediately regretted the tone he had used on her. It did not help that there were still unshed tears in those lovely blue eyes. His arm extended without his conscious effort, as if his body thought on its own. He wrapped it around the lady's waist and pulled her gently to his chest as the other wound around her back. Her arms wasted no time in wrapping tightly around his waist as the fact that she had narrowly avoided death caught up to her. Her shoulders trembled with the small sobs she was now releasing against Thor's armor. His hand would travel to her chestnut waves of hair as he whispered words of comfort to her. The sounds of her sobs pulled at his heart in such ways he'd never felt before. "Everything is okay, now, dear heart," he whispered running his fingers through the woman's hair. "You're safe now; I shall lay waste to anything that dare try to harm you." His fingers rubbed soothing circles in her lower back.

"I'm s-s-sorry…" She stammered. "F-f-for scaring you…"

Oh, this precious woman, worried about how _he_ felt when she was the one who had a near brush with death. Thor pulled her closer. "Hush," he said gently. "You needn't apologize to me, you sweet woman. Just refrain from falling out of the sky again."

That brought out a small giggle from the woman. It was music to his ears. "Deal," She said as she pulled back from him. "I will do my best."

Thor placed a gentle hand against her face and used his thumb to swipe away the remaining tears. He leaned down to place a kiss on her forehead. He had an urge to capture those perfect lips with his own. Everything about her called out to him. He wanted to make this woman his in every single form of the word. What was this claim she held over him?


	3. Chapter 3

Part Three

"She cannot hold her own against Banner if he were to change. I do not feel that she should be left alone with him without proper training." Thor was fairly certain that his opinion was not needed, but he wanted to throw in his say anyhow. Colleen had some sort of claim on his heart and he had no desire to see something happen to her. She needed only to walk by him and he felt a weakness in his knees and his heart skipped a beat.

Romanov laughed dryly at him. "We have attempted to train her, besides being irresistibly cute and amazing at twisting words to make absolutely anyone do what she wishes; Colleen is an accident waiting for place to happen." She said. "She is more likely to shoot something that the bullet would bounce off of and come back to hit her."

Thor narrowed his eyes at her. "Then you must understand that she is not safe with Banner!" He exclaimed. "Allow me to teach her self-defense!"

"Are you saying you can do a better job than I have?" Romanov's glare was triple his own. "Besides, you are so much bigger and stronger than she is! You could really hurt her."

"What do you think of me, Lady Romanov?" Thor said, offended by her words. As if he could actually bring himself to harm the little mortal who had such possession of his heart. "Why would I ever hurt her?"

"It is just that you and everyone else that possesses a penis aboard this ship wants to stick it in my Colleen!" Romanov snapped. "And…"

She was cut off by Steve who slammed his hand down on the table. "I only took her on _one_ date, Natasha!" He snapped. "Why does it bother you so much?"

Romanov sighed loudly and rolled her eyes. She turned her heated glare to Steve. "It bothers me so much because you're ninety years old! She's only twenty two! She's a baby compared to you."

Steve gaped at her and then gestured to Thor wildly. "He's two thousand!" He snapped. "She's not even an embryo compared to him."

Thor narrowed his eyes and shook his head. He took Romanov's wrist into his and regained her attention. "Lady Romanov, I do not have any intentions on doing anything sexual with Colleen. Where I come from we do not do anything like that until after we have married! I have not even courted her yet." He said sincerely. "Colleen is a lady; she deserves to be lavished in compliments, gifts and favors. She deserves to be taken to the finest restaurants and all doors should be opened and held for her. She deserves to be showered in romance as sweet as she is. She is not a concubine. She is a lady and deserves to be treated as such."

Romanov gaped at him for a moment and then a smile creeped up on her face. She shot the smile to Steve. "_That_ right there is why he gets to spend time with her. Thor appeals to my mothering instincts." She said.

Steve glared at her with a dismayed look on his face. "I held the door open for her! I took her to an expensive restaurant! Did you see that bracelet she has been wearing? It was sent from an anonymous admirer. I'll give you a hint as to who may have sent it!" He said and folded his arms across his chest. A pout formed on his face.

"Shut up, Steve." Romanov said simply, she turned her attention back to Thor. "Yes, you can teach her self-defense. Someone _else_ is telling that girl that she can't see Banner and someone else is _definitely_ telling Banner that he can't see Colleen." She removed her hand from Thor's and walked over to Steve, patting his shoulders. "If you would like to be back in my favor, you could go do the latter."

"There is no reason for me to not be in your favor, Natasha!" Steve snapped.

"You gave her a defective parachute and she nearly had a meeting with death far before her time." Romanov hissed. "I do not think that a mother would just allow her child to go out alone with someone, who crashed his car while she was in it, would she?"

"That is not even an accurate thing to compare it to! You told me to give her that parachute!" Steve argued exasperatedly. "She has forgiven me, why can't you?"

"She forgives in seconds. She is blind to anyone's faults!" Romanov retorted. "I do not have her ability to love without question. I do not have her ability to forgive anyone who asks in a half sincere way. You have to work for it with me." She then left the room in a huff before she did something violent she would regret.

…

Colleen had not spoken a word to Thor. She had sat on the opposite side of the room of him, glaring at him with the most irresistible pout on her face. He had a hard time remaining as stoic as she when she was being so precious. "Why can't I see Dr. Banner?" She finally whined. "This is not fair; Natasha could not teach me to shoot a gun, why do you think you can do any different? I'm useless beyond being able to twist words."

Thor smiled endearingly at her. "That is not true." He said as he dropped Mjolnir on the floor and approached her. He took her hand in his and knelt to press his lips gently to it. "You know that too, I will not accept any more foul words against yourself."

Colleen's glare softened a little. "Or what?" She asked.

"You will be punished." Thor said simply, smiling mischievously.

Colleen stood up and shot him a purely seductive look. "Oh yeah? What are you going to do? Put me in timeout?" She asked. "Spank me like a child?"

Thor kept his mischievous smile. "Trust me, little Colleen, you would rather not find out." He said. "Now come, throw a punch at me."

"I'm not going to fight you, Thor. Nor would I if this were a real life situation." She said. "I would look at you, assess that you were much bigger and stronger than I am and attempt to talk you out of beating the crap out of me."

"And if your magic words could not sway me?"

Colleen swayed her hips a little as she walked and he was certain that it had not been there before. It was _incredibly_ distracting. It did not help that her voice had taken on a very seductive tone. "Oh, I assure you, my 'magic' words have had ways of bringing bigger men to their knees." She whispered as she neared him. She pressed herself up onto her tip toes that her lips were mere inches from his own before she turned away from him.

Oooh, she played dirty. Thor chuckled as he regained composure. "I highly doubt that your words have always worked in your favor. What have you done in the past when your silver tongue has failed you?"

Colleen turned to face him, but her face no longer held seduction. She wore a mask of pain and Thor felt as if he had grabbed a nerve and twisted it. He regretted asking her the question at all as it was obvious that he had made her recall a bleak part of her past. "I got the crap beat out of me." She snarled at him. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm small. I don't pose much of a threat."

"You do not need to be big to be strong, Colleen." Thor said softly. "I believe that you are very strong. Many women much bigger than you would have perished in your situation, correct?"

"That was entirely because I have this ability to talk people out of kicking my ass." Colleen said as she turned around. She began to circle him. "Can I not talk you out of kicking my ass?"

"If I were Loki, then no, you likely would not be able to convince me not to hurt you in every way I knew possible." Thor said firmly. "Colleen, I am not doing this to punish you. I am genuinely concerned for your well-being."

"Your brother has quite a weakness for my hips I do believe." Colleen said and then wiggled said hips ever so tortuously as she walked.

"So you aspire to have him take all of your innocence for his own? These are not high aspirations for your future, little Colleen." He scolded.

Colleen huffed. "Just leave me alone, Thor." She hissed. "I can do what I want. You cannot keep me from seeing Doctor Banner. You are not my keeper."

Thor was growing frustrated with his little mortal. He flung one arm out and wrapped her waist in his steel grip. She let out a sound that a mixture of surprise and complaint as dragged her over to a chair. He sat down upon and tossed her over his lap, pinning her over his lap with one arm. He brought his other hand down upon her small, round backside with a resounding crack. She let out a sound that ripped at his heart; it was halfway between a scream and a sob. He had to be rough with her in order to get through to her. He brought his hand down again and was met with the same sound of pain from Colleen. He was amazed that she was not protesting. "It does not bring me pleasure to bring you pain, Colleen." His tone was firm but soft as he punctuated his words with steady smacks to her rear, each one igniting the same sound from Colleen and ripping at his heart. "There are those out there that their only pleasure _is_ to bring you pain, Colleen. You cannot speak your magic soothing words and expect for them to calm every monster out there."

Colleen reached back in attempt to stop the blows. Thor caught her arms gently and restrained it to her back and continued his assault on her backside. "Thor…" She whimpered. "You're hurting me."

"That would be the point, love. This is not meant to be pleasant. You cannot talk your way out of this situation, can you Colleen? You feel defenseless." Words still quiet but firm. "Do you like this feeling? I am holding back. Others will destroy you without even batting an eye. This pains me to do."

She had upset him. That was what broke her. He wasn't doing this to be mean. He was doing this because he was scared for her. Her cries melted to tears and soft sobbing and his onslaught against her backside slowed in pace. "I'm sorry…" She whimpered. "I'm sorry… I will try harder. I promise. I'm sorry. Thor… Thor please…"

He could not continue to harm her when she whimpered his name in that sorrowful tone. He released her arm and rubbed small circles against her lower back as her sobs calmed. He gently lifted her from his lap. Her hands covered her face in an attempt to quell her tears. He gently pulled them away from her face to reveal swollen red eyes. She was still as beautiful as ever in her heart breaking way. He tilted her chin up to look at him. "You do understand why I have hurt you, right?"

She sniffled and nodded slightly, avoiding his eyes as best she could. "I wasn't trying hard enough." She said sadly.

Thor's fingers brushed the tears away from her perfect cheeks. "Look at me please, dear heart."

She brought those tear filled eyes to his and his heart may have shattered into a million pieces. "Are you still angry with me?" She asked, her voice trembling.

"Sweet, sweet, Colleen," He said gently. "I was never angry. I was perhaps frustrated but I am frightened for your safety. I care for you, Colleen. I cannot always protect you." There was a question in Colleen's eyes as she worried her lip with her teeth. "You can ask me anything, whisper it, do not be afraid of me."

Her eyes filled with tears yet again. He would have done anything to keep them from spilling from her eyes. "Can I have a hug?" She asked as if she actually expected him to refuse her.

"Oh, Colleen," Thor pulled her down into his lap and cradled the small girl within his arms and began to shower her cheeks with soft kisses. "You never, never, never have to ask me for an embrace," he whispered in her ear before pressing a kiss to her neck. "I will never run out of them when it comes to you, my sweet Colleen."

Colleen sniffled and laid her head against Thor's chest. "So, is that what you meant when you said you would punish me?" She asked.

Thor chuckled and looked down at her with a twinkle in his eye. "Yes, but it is worse if you insult yourself."


End file.
